Beer – #10 in a series – Introducing the Bishops Finger

I look like a bit like someone who's escaped from somewhere, can't help that. Tonight it's the Bishops Finger, a dark Kentish Strong Ale.

The local New World supermarket seems to have cottoned on to the "luxury" end of the imported beer, and have such a wide range and choice that it's hard to maintain a sense of normal and only spend enough for the night in.

Tonight, then, the Bishops finger, a  5.4% Ale in a handy pint sized bottle. It's $8.00 a bottle, which is sort of about right price, I guess.

The label describes Toffee and Berries, I just smelt a rich bitter beer smell that so reminds me of English pub ale. It pours well and it drinks just great. You can tell that I'm wearing a real shirt with buttons, it's a work night, and it may not end well.

On the arbitrary stars-0-meter this would an easy 9 arbitrary stars out of 10 arbitrary stars. It's good.

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Who you going to call? - Ghostbusters (of Auckland)

There is a new "professional" team of Ghost Hunters in Auckland. They had a live tweeting of an "emergency" investigation on the 5th February, at night of course.

Anyway I was on twitter and I was following their commentary. And of course I asked one question too many, well I asked a couple of questions but mostly I was being wildly critical. The result was they "blocked me"

The emergency was at one of their own team houses, a 16 year old "new" house where Heather from Henderson lives , "She has lived in a haunted house as a child, and now lives in another haunted house; complete with ghost cat and a Shadow Person". So straight off the bat you have someone convinced there is a "ghost" and they are taking part in the investigation.



But that's ok because "She has an analytical mind, which is good for debunking"

So then to the science.

They use an Iphone app iOvilus - which is listed under "Entertainment" on the Itunes Store.  It has a 1000 word dictionary and it listens to the environment and then comes up with a word

"The iOvilus is based on the same method of ITC communications as the highly controversial Ovilus.  The iOvilus produces speech based on changes to sensors in the iPhone or iPod Touch.  Simply, the idea is that an outside force can affect a change that registers a response. Instrumental Trans Communications "ITC" is not new, however, the methods used to try and achieve it are changing greatly."

The Ovilus, or Puck, is an electronic speech-synthesis device which utters words depending on electromagnetic waves in the air, by using an EMF Meter. The device was created by Bill Chappell, a retired electronics engineer interested in the paranormal who creates devices for the field.

Due to the random nature of the replies, many paranormal research groups have stopped using the Ovilus because too much is left to chance. It is posited that a person could pull random words out of a hat and get the same response as what comes out of the Ovilus. Many liken it to an electronic 8 Ball or Ouija Board

They also cracked out the scientific dowsing Rods

To say that I'm less than impressed is to make a huge understatement. To block someone from twitter because they are being contrary to your beliefs isn't professional that's just not engaging in a conversation with you, and that's not science is it?

The Photographs: I'm going to add some of the pictures they posted on twitpic, I'll include the links so you can see for yourself.

I give you the links here : Ghosts Of Auckland presents

#Ghosthunt#Paranormal above Jennifer's head http://twitpic.com/8fzwax

#ghosthunt#Paranormalhttp://twitpic.com/8fzvlc

#Paranormal#Ghosthunt still there... http://twitpic.com/8fzv0b

#Paranormal#Ghosthunt Andrew has a hitchhiker... http://twitpic.com/8fzugt

Big orb #Ghosthunthttp://twitpic.com/8fzdw8

http://twitpic.com/8fzatx - 3 orbs, in a line going across the entry to the closet

#Ghosthunt orb wth ripples? http://twitpic.com/8fzcpn

#Ghosthunt here's a nice orb! http://twitpic.com/8fzatx

So you'll see all the "orbs" are in the same plane and all the same size in all the photos. But they are "orbs" of course. Of course. Not light on the lens, a reflection or anything mundane but proof positive.

I'll leave it there as I'm laughing too much and I'll end with a few snippets of an "investigation" courtesy of the Ghost of Auckland Website

Q. Why mention this? IS it to prove that you are sceptical or analytical  -  "A few EVP sessions were done, to which I don’t know the results as yet. I sat in the corner at one time and felt an icy cold spot to the right of me. I checked around and noticed the window behind me, so I’ve put it down to that."

Q. Really, this happened without corroboration or independent witness, or replication? "On first opening the door to the kitchen during the walkthrough, a shadow was seen darting into the corner. So some of us had quite an interest in this room. Later on I was in this room by myself. As I sat there in the dark, I heard what sounded like running water and a dripping noise. I shone my torch to where the noise was and saw there was a sink there. I checked the sink and there were signs that there never has been running water in it for years. Dry!! I later found that the tap doesn’t work either. This is a possible paranormal event. "

Q. Again the Question is "You've gone here expecting a result" "I was leading a team member to where the next spirit could be and I sensed that the study is where there was one [...] I started to feel energy building at the back of my head, which is a signal that someone wanted me to channel them [...] The chill then backed off. We later left, and I said I got the impression that the spirit was of an older male, taller, had white hair and beard, 60s to 70s. In the base office I saw a photograph of the family and pointed out the picture of the Reverend Lush himself. This picture was the spitting image of the person I sensed"

It beggars belief, and should end with "Which I hadn't seen before or anything, and as I had no expectation of seeing, sensing or having an "event" I can't explain how this happened"

So there you have it, science in action, involving people who want to and firmly belive in ghosts, spirits and the paranormal as seen on TV.

The imaginary Dinner party

It's your imaginary Dinner Party - the one where you get to invite anyone, after all it is your game, and they can be living, dead or even fictional, yes if you're a complete geek you can invite Dr.Who.

Naturally I'd probably laugh at anyone who wanted to invite any or all the following: Nelson Mandela, Sherlock Holmes, James Bond (as James Bond, if you want Pierce Brosnan just say it), Bono, Bob Geldorf, Julius Caesar, Boudicca, Cleopatra, Sting... this is a list n progress...

But who would I invite. Let say its a table of 8. So that 7 others.

It would be tempting to invite the pseudo famous people, those having achieved once for world glory, like Edmond Hillary, although I'd only want to ask him who was really first to the top (after of course George Malory - but he never got back to claim the prize) him or Norgay Tenzing, or a in vogue film star like Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie, Demi Moore, Bruce Willis who's fame is as fleeting as their next job of work, or other intellectuals such as Einstein just because you were showing off.

Language isn't a barrier, but then you are able to invite a fictional character so everyone would speak English :-)

So I came up with a list that starts as

• Shakespeare


• Hitler


• Sitting Bull


• Henry Ford

And then I got stuck. And I've thought about this for a week now and you know that I'd only want one person to share an evening with and that'd be my Dad, Who died in 1988 and was unwell for many years before then and when I was out spreading my wings and doing my thing, not being home and generally growing up.

Sure it'd be a fun evening with Ricky Gervais, Steve Martin, Robin Williams, Cameron Diaz, Daniel Craig or a table with all the differnt James Bonds , but it wouldn't enlighten me.

All the opportunity to invite someone you don't know, never will know, and know nothing about, apart from the face you see on the TV screen and the words represented in the media.

So time with my Dad would be all I would like. Seriously.

45 Startling and Awkward Portrait Photos

Some of them came as a bit of a shock.

[gallery link="file" order="DESC" orderby="rand"]

Bad Parenting - the one with the wind-up

Warning! Spoiler alert! There is no gambling addiction in my household, I made it up

Parenting like any relationship is about a level of trust in someone. I like to think that by and large we have great parental relationships with our children. But sometimes the occasion arrises when you can have a bit of Fun.  I feel bad about picking the subject I did, gambling addiction, which is all too real a problem for some households, but it just came out and once out it's like putting a cat back into a bag. So don't be offended our have faux outrage, it was a story that we collaborated accidentally in for our own amusement. This may have been brought on my the ongoing angst that my partner has about the children not even buying a birthday card for her this week. I know right, not even a card!

So here we go then:

Friday Evening after a particularly tedious and time-long commute home, it was warm, I was looking forward to the weekend, I slumped onto the couch.

My Daughter wandered into the room, glances at me as asks "Why are you crying?". I wasn't crying but I was wearing contact lenses that probably needed taking out and cleaning and that sometimes makes me frown. "No seriously what's up?" she says. She's now 17 and thinks she very worldly.

"Nothing", I replied. I can see a look on her face that she's not going to let this go. "Dad, it looks like you've been crying!"

""Ok" I said "it's like this, it's a bit difficult to tell you and I don't know if you'll like it" I started so I had to finish. "We have a few financial problems, we've got to sell the house and move to a smaller place. This means that you'll have to leave your school and possibly not play hockey this year. Your mother has spent all out money, we owe the bank thousands and we have nothing left. You mother has a gambling addiction and has spent everything"

This lead to a moment's silence and a rapid fire "What?, You're Joking, and Serious?" pause "Wait, What?, You can't be serious, that's not true!"

"Of course it's true" I said "Why lie?"

At this point my partner walks into the room and daughter says "Mum, is it true we have to move?" My partner just said deadpan "Yes it's true"

I don't know why she said that we hadn't planned it, talked about or even thought about it. I could tell by her tone that she was just agreeing in that tired and  weary way that partners sometimes get - just say yes to go with the flow. I was surprised but I smiled on the insides

"NO it's not true, you're lying" continued the daughter "Do you have a gambling addiction?" and again my partner deadpan says "yes I do"

Daughter is flummoxed but not completely flustered, not distraught but confused by all this. "Where do you think she goes every weekend when she goes to 'the library'?" I asked "Nobody goes to the library every day, she's at the gambling place"  I also said that she'd left her work and spent all day at the poker machines, and we were flat broke penniless

Daughter is adamant that we're lying, which of course we are, but we're not letting on. She spent a few minutes explaining why she couldn't leave school and then with a finality said "Well you're both lying, and I don't belive you"

So for 15 minutes on a Friday the world ended for my daughter.  Cruel and unusual parenting? why yes, yes it was. Torture? not really, there really wasn't any conviction in the discussion, and besides which we would have had it in a more formal setting, like all the family in the room.

There is no gambling problem, we don't have to move, and life carries on as it was before.

Daughter is going to have her revenge one day, I can't wait.